Top 10 reasons why men (that's us) are jerks

by Robin S. Joseph

1)We pretty much run the world(or we like to think we do) so we can afford to be jerks :)

2)Being a jerk is an efficient survival strategy:
let me tell u about the circumstances in which not only me but many boys like me grow up.
ours was a boys school a damn good 1 at that but growing up in an all boys school can be tough
specially if u are a soft kind of boy (if u know what i mean)
if u r of the above kind it means u r prime meat, u r practically a girl
n trust me 2000 boys who have not seen the sights of a girl in ages will go 4 anything
so ur only line of defense,your last hope of survival,is to become a jerk
because being a jerk in some way symbolizes ur manhood n helps u fit in.
tragic but true.

3)because we are practically brain dead when it comes to deciding what's cool.
dont believe me? Here are a few examples:
--we think smoking is cool (brain dead logic)
--we think drinking is cool (brain dead logic)
--we thought lindsay lohan and britney spears were cool(and both ended up in rehab)
--superman thought wearing his shiny red underwear over his elastic slax in public was cool
--batman thought running around the city at night in a shawl shooting people was cool
--a certain mr x thought getting kicked (u know where) and living to tell about it was cool
(okay maybe that was actually cool!!!!u rock mr. x)
--and as for tarzan well he didnt think at all but still most guys think he is cool

so all this being said is it any surprise that men think being a jerk is cool????


4)most men considered individually are pretty descent, it may be shocking,but its true.
it is male group behaviour that forces them to turn into jerks.
I ve seen even the nicest lil mama's boy go from innocent when alone to the devil personified
when in a group with his friends.

5)We think cursing 4 no reason is cooooooooooooooooooooool.(O Teri pehn di)
it is sumthin i think only guys will understand.
When two guys(who happen to be friends) meet after a long time the depth of their friendship
can be understood and calculated by the quality and quantity of curse words they use 4 each other
as per the followin formula:

depth_of_frndship = l*rf*curse_word

where;
l= level of the abuse inflicted by the curse word
rf= repitition factor(it denotes the no of times curse words are repeated)

so if two guys are meeting after a long time and 1 of them says :
"saala kutta sharam ata hai tereko bolte hue ki tu dost hai?"
it might actually be a compliment!

or if its something like:
" u #$#%#%^@$!$%!%@ !$#!%$%#$^%#^$&^&* #$%@%@$^#$^##^^...^%*^&*(%&^%^#%%#535????"
then u can clearly understand that they are long lost brothers

so if cursing makes us jerks then i have to say that we are proud of it.
(oh wait this could have been my next point)

6) We think beating the shit out of some poor defenseless being and then making him beg 4 mercy is cool so cool infact that some leave no opportunity to narrate such incidents of their so
called bravery and some think that it is soooooo sooooo coooooool that they even add it to
the SPECIAL SKILLS & EXTRA-CARRICULAR activities column in their job resumes!(true story)

7)Because we just love to make our girl friends cry.
dont believe me? just listen to "I LOVE TO SEE U CRY" by Enrique (man that s*it is messed up)
A dude i know is such an expert that he can make his girl friend cry just by lookin at her
a feat that the rest of us can only hope to achieve in our wildest dreams

8)Because when we say we respect women we ommit the part that says "as long as they do what i tell em to do"

9)Because we invented lame a** concepts like love n romance just so we could get laid :)

10)Because some extreme jerks write articles about why all of us are jerks and then think
they are cool for having written such articles


all comments/confessions on why we are jerks are most welcome feel free to share

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